There are lots of kooky conspiracy theories and wild rumours about powerful people out there.  But I just found one that takes the cake for sheer outlandishness:

A former hooker has claimed that Dubya was an active homosexual as a private citizen.

Hey, maybe it's true, and that's why he's waging war on fundamentalist Islam ?  (The mullahs are pretty homophobic, after all ... )   

Of all the contemporary music stars Bjork is the most annoying by far.  That kooky, pixified persona just makes my skin crawl.  And her voice makes me wanna crack skulls.

Worse still, the taxpayer-funded Sydney Festival has booked her to perform at the Opera House.  So, that Godawful shrieking of hers will be subsidised ... by me. 

Ugh!

The Brady Bunch was the most wholesome family on the teev.  But there was bed-hopping aplenty behind the scenes.  Sons and mothers, brothers and sisters were going at it like bunnies on Viag ra, apparently.

There was also gaiety.  While this is considered yawn-worthy nowadays, it would have been scandalous as when the show was being made.

Robert Reed, who played the straighter-than-straight patriarch was actually gay in real life and ended up dying of AIDS, poor bastard.  There are even rumours about a lesbian relationship occurring between the actresses who played the sisters Marcia and Jan. 

Crikey! 

You'd think that the most likely cast member to be a dyke was the actress Ann B Davis, who played the cheerfully mannish maid Alice Nelson.  But the chances are slim, I reckon, since she's now an Episcopalian.

It's all quite ironic considering the context. 

Interesting that the death of Marcel Marceau is such big news. 

I think that this reveals just how obscure his skill is.  I mean, he wasn't just the most famous mime artist in the world.  He was the only famous mime artist in the world.  So his passing seems like some sort of apocalypse for the art form. 

Of course this is not the case with other performing arts -- acting, for instance.  There are a squillion old movie stars.  And it seems as if one of them kicks the bucket practically every week.  Sure, there's always an affectionate tribute on the teev.  But it doesn't seem all that sad, 'cause you just know that another one will cark it the following week!

Wonder who will fill Marcel's slippers as the definitive mime artist?  I'm sure that whoever does will become a household name before long. 

Sheesh.  I thought Bindi Irwin was living in a strange, destructive world.  But have a look at the poisonous environment in which the daughter of the late Michael Hutchence is growing up.

Poor kid.   

There seems to be this huge push by activist vegans to make their lifestyle sexy.  Strikes me as odd, since I always thought it was some sort of moral or ethical choice.

Alicia Silverstone is the latest celeb to nude up for the no-meat brigade.  Somehow, I think that her campaign is more about her trying to stay in the public eye than anything else. 

What do you reckon?

This is interesting.  A new show with high production values is being made for MySpace.  Called Quarterlife, it's about the trails and tribulations of a bunch of pretty young things who are all wired up, tech savvy and heavily into social networking. 

Sounds a bit like The Secret Life of Us.  Er, yet not so secret ...

The nancification of the male race continues:

Sweden, which in days of yore boasted the wildest, hairiest, most carnivorous skull-crackers in all of Blokedom is now being overrun by fashion conscious SNAGs.  These preening  metrosexuals are shopping up a storm in the retail precincts of Stockholm while their more masculine girlfiends significant others bring home the bacon and pee standing up!

And whose famous name adorns these poncy accessories? None other than one-time ice-cool tennis legend Bjorn Borg.

Bloke's certainly got the (hand)bags.  But they no longer contain any balls.   

How sad is that? 

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Making a buck is still seen as antithetical to environmental concerns.  The "concrete jungle" has long been seen as the the polar opposite of a real one, after all. 

But it seems that things are changing; that a major "paradigm shift" is occurring.  With so many people both aware of and concerned about the environment business people the world over are tailoring their ventures to suit.   

An example is the boom in eco-tourism, in which holiday accommodation and activities are specifically designed to have minimal impact on the local environment.  Hawaiian Beach Rentals offers this kind of holiday on the island of Oahu and others. 

Oahu is the third largest of the Hawaiian islands and famous for its North Shore, mecca for surfers from all over the globe.  While it's the most populous of the Hawaiian islands, with close to a million people, it is still mostly countryside.  Tourists can choose from a wide variety of Oahu vacation homes and enjoy the stunningly beautiful natural surroundings, safe in the knowledge they're not trashing them. 

In a searing piece of political analysis Bernard "PowderBrain" Fanning has sledged the APEC summit and all those who attended. 

Couldn't even be bothered with the usual accusations of racism, fascism, etc.  Just claimed that security was ugly and that the world leaders who attended were "f--kwits".

What does that then say about his attitude to the people who voted them in -- including in his own country?

Reveals an ugly, egocentric disdain for democracy that is all too common in the entertainment scene.

There's much speculation about whether John Howard should cede the leadership to Peter Costello before the next election.

Rudd's backers are emboldened by the polls, and are all desperate to believe that the people all adore him now because he spoke fluent Mandarin at APEC. 

My thoughts:  Australians will really concentrate on the issues as we come into the home stretch.  They'll see that Howard is still the best option.  He's getting on, but he's still way more impressive than the preening, poncy Rudd.

It'll be close, but I reckon the old master will pull the rabbit out of the hat one last time.

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Pop star Avril Lavigne seems to have overdosed on her own fame.  As a now notorious interview makes clear, she's completely and utterly full of herself.

Or maybe it's the opposite?  Perhaps she's just incredibly insecure, and on the verge of a nervous breakdown that'll make the bizarre antics of Lohan, Spears and Hilton seem sane by comparison.

Either way it's sad.  She's a spunky little creature -- not to mention talented. 

Here's an interesting summary of sad yuckmeisters; a kind of visual merry misery go round. 

Sure, comics do tend to be moody pricks.  But I wonder why people find this surprising.  Jokes and joking are inherently and obviously cruel and dark.  Just sublimated aggro, mostly. 

Roger Daltrey has stated the bleedin' obvious:  Pete Doherty has a death wish.

He's not the only one in the current crop.  There's Winehouse, Lohan, Wilson, the list goes on.  They all seem to have death wishes.  But interestingly, they're all still around.

Last flashbulb addict I can remember who carked it prematurely was Anna Nicole Smith.  That was a while ago now.  But, as Daltrey himself reminds us, back in his day there was a whole plethora of stars who kicked the bucket in spectacular fashion.

I say, if you're gonna have a death wish, then you should do what they did and make it come true!  Today's celebs are a pack of bloody wimps, I reckon.

Still on the subject of celebs and drugs:  Apparently Pet Doherty watched the, er, troubled Amy Winehouse nearly buy the farm after an OD then buggered off.

He's a bit of a curse, is Pete.  I'd say he should be avoided at all costs.

Ex-smokers can be the most judgemental of others who do smoke.  Looks like those who used harder drugs suffer from a similar condition. 

Take Courtney Love, for instance, who has recently chastised both Steve Coogan and now Amy Winehouse for indulging in illicit substances.

Talk about the heroin calling the cocaine, er, white.    

In an endorsement that must surely do damage to Barack Obama's chances of becoming prez, George Clooney describes the Democrat hopeful as having the aura of a rock star.  Clooney said it as if having such a quality was some sort of prerequisite for the position, or at least a major asset.

What a bizarre thing to say! There's no doubt that Mick Jagger has charisma, but would you want him in charge of the economy?